What the fuck is a segue?
What to do when you're riding a slight caffeine buzz at midnight and feeling vaguely self-important? Blog, of course. Even if it is for the first time in weeks and you've misplaced all the things you actually meant to blog. You know, the things that people might actually be interested in... Suddenly you pause to consider the possibility that "interesting topics" and blogs might be mutually exclusive, all the while feeling very self-conscious about your insistence on maintaining the third-person narrative just because you happened to start the damned post that way and haven't really done anything content-wise to warrant the style shift just yet...
Fuckin' A.
So anyway, I once again find myself in love with the fact that with my coffee/pop/etc consumption at near historic lows my body is so inefficient at processing caffeine that a mere cup of green tea has enough kick in it to ratchet my alertness to ave-like intensities, if only for a very short while. See, wait... Yes, it's gone now. The Crash, Oh God.
But seriously, I love it when drugs work, and I hate it when taking too much of them makes them stop working. That line is never so easily crossed with me as it is with caffeine, and I relish my chances to abuse it now that it once again apparently has some power over my physiology.
...totally random, but speaking of "once again," has anyone else ever looked at that phrase and just scratched their head and thought, "well, what the fuck is that even supposed to mean, exactly?" Who put those two words together in that order and thought that made perfect sense? I fucking hate the english language. But not really.
Anyway, moving on. Now that I am ONCE AGAIN of unaided mind and wallowing in my customarily pedestrian and fickle processes, I can freely change the subject a third time to current events. Well, less current events. Yes, that's it. The event I speak of was a decision made sometime last Tuesday. And that decision is as follows: I've decided that I am not so sure about my roommates. First off, they're old, and they're constantly forgetting things and then blaming them on me. "Where did you put the remote?" "Where did you put the phone?" "Where did you put the dog?"
Secondly, they yell at me for taking too long in the shower. "It's been 3 minutes, Brian, get the fuck out or I'm calling the cops!"
Thirdly, they're constantly doing irritating things like setting the toaster from "stun" to "kill" and not setting it back, thereby rendering my english muffins to black smoldering coals. See that, they've got me eating english-fudging-muffins!
And perhaps worst of all, despite no ability whatsoever to manage the whereabouts of their personal affects, they've suddenly remembered that THEY own my fucking car.
The dog is real nice though.
.
Fuckin' A.
So anyway, I once again find myself in love with the fact that with my coffee/pop/etc consumption at near historic lows my body is so inefficient at processing caffeine that a mere cup of green tea has enough kick in it to ratchet my alertness to ave-like intensities, if only for a very short while. See, wait... Yes, it's gone now. The Crash, Oh God.
But seriously, I love it when drugs work, and I hate it when taking too much of them makes them stop working. That line is never so easily crossed with me as it is with caffeine, and I relish my chances to abuse it now that it once again apparently has some power over my physiology.
...totally random, but speaking of "once again," has anyone else ever looked at that phrase and just scratched their head and thought, "well, what the fuck is that even supposed to mean, exactly?" Who put those two words together in that order and thought that made perfect sense? I fucking hate the english language. But not really.
Anyway, moving on. Now that I am ONCE AGAIN of unaided mind and wallowing in my customarily pedestrian and fickle processes, I can freely change the subject a third time to current events. Well, less current events. Yes, that's it. The event I speak of was a decision made sometime last Tuesday. And that decision is as follows: I've decided that I am not so sure about my roommates. First off, they're old, and they're constantly forgetting things and then blaming them on me. "Where did you put the remote?" "Where did you put the phone?" "Where did you put the dog?"
Secondly, they yell at me for taking too long in the shower. "It's been 3 minutes, Brian, get the fuck out or I'm calling the cops!"
Thirdly, they're constantly doing irritating things like setting the toaster from "stun" to "kill" and not setting it back, thereby rendering my english muffins to black smoldering coals. See that, they've got me eating english-fudging-muffins!
And perhaps worst of all, despite no ability whatsoever to manage the whereabouts of their personal affects, they've suddenly remembered that THEY own my fucking car.
The dog is real nice though.
.
Labels: green tea
posted by reno mac @ 11:41 PM
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